arroz con gandules
The individual is the maker of the very environment to which he becomes a slave; but he has also the power to break away from it and create an environment that will not dull his mind or spirit.
Can I get a hell yes! The environment in which I was brought up in was a complete fabrication. We were poor. Not dirt poor but poor enough. Hiding that from friends and strangers is my mom's goal; no not past tense but present tense. Come mierda. Like mother/like daughter. The wall that I thought helped me gain leverage and status actually kept me from gaining so much more. I have friends; I have close friends but do they really know the real me? Do I know the real them? Do I know the real me? I've coffee'd w/them. I've gotten drunk w/them. I've fought w/them but how deep have I really gotten w/them? My entire life has been lived behind bloody barriers and now that I need to let others in and myself out, bitter sweetness takes over. How liberating it feels to be open and accept others as they accept me. How terrifying this feeling is as well.
Gentle Readers, This morning as I was checking my email, I received the best gift one can receive on a mundane Thursday; my first comment on my blog! Read on..I came upon your blog during my random sojourn through the "next blog" button and wanted to let you know that I visited, and that I did read your blog. You express your spiritual and psychological turmoil well.
Can you say validation! I'm carving out my little piece of cyberspace for my own musings & rants & raves & escapes but to have someone actually not only read it but take the time to comment and not only comment but positive feedback?!! My head is about to explode I'm so giddy. I am overly critical of my writing and this is another small victory. Small victories, small victories! This will fuel me through today & help me get thru my less than desirable job. AAAAAH! (<-- but in a good way!) Damn, another life lesson learned. Life is too short to overburden myself with self-loathing and defeatist attitudes.
Can I get a hell yes! The environment in which I was brought up in was a complete fabrication. We were poor. Not dirt poor but poor enough. Hiding that from friends and strangers is my mom's goal; no not past tense but present tense. Come mierda. Like mother/like daughter. The wall that I thought helped me gain leverage and status actually kept me from gaining so much more. I have friends; I have close friends but do they really know the real me? Do I know the real them? Do I know the real me? I've coffee'd w/them. I've gotten drunk w/them. I've fought w/them but how deep have I really gotten w/them? My entire life has been lived behind bloody barriers and now that I need to let others in and myself out, bitter sweetness takes over. How liberating it feels to be open and accept others as they accept me. How terrifying this feeling is as well.
Gentle Readers, This morning as I was checking my email, I received the best gift one can receive on a mundane Thursday; my first comment on my blog! Read on..I came upon your blog during my random sojourn through the "next blog" button and wanted to let you know that I visited, and that I did read your blog. You express your spiritual and psychological turmoil well.
Can you say validation! I'm carving out my little piece of cyberspace for my own musings & rants & raves & escapes but to have someone actually not only read it but take the time to comment and not only comment but positive feedback?!! My head is about to explode I'm so giddy. I am overly critical of my writing and this is another small victory. Small victories, small victories! This will fuel me through today & help me get thru my less than desirable job. AAAAAH! (<-- but in a good way!) Damn, another life lesson learned. Life is too short to overburden myself with self-loathing and defeatist attitudes.
posted by be who you are at 9:13 PM
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